That's how you fight loneliness

Match Date # 1: The Inspector
2:30 PM, Monday afternoon

As I prepared to go meet Inspector, I reviewed our correspondence thus far. He had emailed me a few times, the first telling me he felt “compelled” to write me after seeing my profile. He had also emailed me to welcome me back to NC when I returned from Boston. The night before our meeting, we had conversed on IM a bit. He told me that he was looking forward to meeting me at least three or four times. I was turned off somewhat by his eagerness. I also found his repeated use of “lol” after most of my responses hokey. However, he was traveling an hour to meet me, and I had already vowed to myself that I would give most everyone a fair shot and try not to judge too much by Internet communication.

I approached the meeting casually. It was nearly 75 degrees; so I opted for jeans, flip flops, a purple v-neck tee, and a light black cardigan. As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw a man tentatively walk up to the doors of the coffee shop, Inspector. He had on jeans; a black button down shirt tucked in and rolled at the elbows, and a black baseball cap.

I parked, checked myself in the mirror for anything awry, and walked towards the coffee shop.

He was nowhere to be seen, so I peaked inside. Again, not in sight.

I walked back outside, confused, and saw him come around the corner of the building.

We were both 10 minutes early.

I walked towards him to shake his hand, but he just lightly grasped mine.

Maybe a handshake is a poor choice on my part, but it seems better than not doing anything.

We walked inside, and I immediately ordered an iced latte. He seemed to stammer a minute, and said that he just wanted tea.

I am more and more convinced that men who ask you to get a cup of coffee don’t usually drink coffee.

I offered to pay as we momentarily both stood there awkwardly with our wallets out.

We sat down and I asked him if he found the place okay. He assured me that directions were good and that he had double-checked on mapquest.

Over the next two hours we chatted relatively easily. We talked about our jobs, traveling, music, iPods, new cars, apartments, and our families. When the conversation turned to food and cooking, he told me that he made “mean grilled chicken,” and that I would have to come to his place sometime so he could make it for me.

I found that two hours passed relatively easily, though I started to get a bit antsy about getting back to the work I needed to do.

He excused himself to the bathroom and said that he didn’t want to keep me any longer.

He offered to walk me to my car and once again lightly shook my hand, saying that he hoped we could do it again.

I felt confident when I said, “Yes, definitely.”

Overall, I felt good about how things had gone. I walked away not knowing if I was interested in him in that way, but he had more potential than I expected.

A few hours later, he emailed me to tell me that he had thoroughly enjoyed meeting me, and that he would be “honored” to take me out again. He suggested dinner and a movie for Saturday, though he had to make sure he was off from work.

I emailed later to say that Saturday should be doable, inquiring about when he would know whether he would need to work.

The next day (Yesterday), he emailed me and called me, twice, to firm up plans.

It was sweet, in a way, but I also worried about him being seemingly very interested given my state of non-commitment.

Needing to decide a few more things, we talked for a few minutes on IM last night. When I said hello, he asked: “Is this the most beautiful English professor at ****”

Okay, again. Sweet. But perhaps too much.

At some point he also called me “darlin” and “cutie.”

He had gone from being slightly nervous to full-steam ahead.

I wondered if it’s easier for him to say those kinds of things online and whether or not he would do the same on Saturday.

I guess I’ll see.

In the meantime, a student asked me in class if I had been at that coffee shop. Apparently he had been at the next table. Lord knows what he heard.

Regardless, here’s to being back in the ring!